May 26, 2010
Just did some housekeeping including deleting numerous spam attempts from assorted purveyors of Rolex watches, penile extension merchants and one Polo shirt Wholesaler. He had the following to add as a comment to a previous blog entry that began with the line ‘Spring time for Hitler, winter for Poland and France’ The comment read ‘I enjoy reading the report, too. It′s easy to understand that a journey like this is the biggest event in ones life’ I was tempted to approve it although it would open the floodgates to most of China’s exporters.
May 26, 2010
Spotted a new past time, knitting for your pets…. The possibilities of humiliating your pooch appear limitless. You can fashion Darling little dragon outfits or indeed whip up a charming little hat like this one. Strangely enough, I remember precisely the same expression when looking at family albums; it is the look of a Christmas present survivor….
May 26, 2010
Following the discovery of a blog, titled Diary of a Jet setting Cat, another new online diary entry has been discovered in cyberspace.
Diary of Le Woof du Jour (or Rovers Return)
Day mmmh oof forgot. Just heard jingle of lead – oh goody – walkies! Managed to get close and sniff toosh of La Belle – cocker spaniel from number 12. Ooooh and found great treasure, big box of KFC chicken bones. Can this day get any better? Yessss – cat came home multi coloured looking like parrot. Wait, jingling of my collar again. Brilliant! Nother walkie! New route full of interesting smells. Stop outside strange smelling place can’t quite make out name S—A—L—O—N Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh! Walk home, avoiding eye contact, enter home – cat lying on chaise licking claws sniggering when sees my latest styling. Got pom poms on my legs. Mental note – remember large puddle near park…
May 26, 2010
Apparently, the latest craze du jour in New York (well, mes petit pois where else indeed???) is to dye your cat in some fetching multi colour design. Forget Joseph and the amazing Technicolor dream coat – now the latest must have accessory is to colour match Le Chat to go with your post modern ironic Lichtenstein pop art paintings. Gosh the possibilities and design variations are limitless.
Incidentally this blog entry has just been discovered
Day 711 My tormentor took me to some strange location full of Hispanic little men in shiny too tight trousers, open shirts and medallions around their chests. Jesus, the proud Puerto Rican keeper of this new torture chamber kept exclaiming ‘Mi hijas what a darrrrrrling little pussssy caat’ while applying some strange toxic lotions on my fur. My captor smiled while watching my latest humiliation. One day when the glorious feline revolution will take place and all cats can walk freely without pink glitter collars I shall repay these creatures for all of those heinous attacks. I discovered some new powers just the other day when my captor brought in a new ally; he fled muttering something about ‘allergy’. I must find out how to harness this new weapon….
May 14, 2010
Seems to be the consensus of many gents that contributed to an industry forum discussing how they justify the expense of their patronage of floozies. Quite right and the dividends are manifold! Well, how many research studies does it need to show that Honey is good for you…? You could spend money of many things that harm your health like alcohol, cigarettes, drugs or far worse purchase an expensive concert ticket to see Whitney Houston live! The latter will leave you with such a trauma that only counselling and possible lengthy therapy can overcome. Surely her audio assault must be illegal under the Geneva Conventions that expressly rule out torture? Saw a TV documentary many months ago that showed a cruel practise of Hong Kong citizens who had the vocal cords of their dogs removed so they won’t bark or cause a nuisance. However, in the case of La Houston it would be the kindest thing to do, especially for the poor audience!
